How to help grandkids get over fear of getting hen-pecked???

[BarnyardChaos]

Ah, so it's the anticipation and the surprise they don't like. Did you ever play a game where you hold your hands out, palms up, and your opponent lays their hands down, palms down on your hands? Then you try to slap their hands before they can pull their hands away. You can clap your hands together or try to get both their hands with both of yours. You can feint, just flinching your hands, to fake them out. If you slap and miss, you reverse positions. But if you slap and hit them, it's still your turn. Maybe playing this game a bit would desensitize them to the "surprise" of being pecked? My kids say this game is called Slapstick. It's a hilarious game, really.

I remember this game! Absolutely doing it with them tomorrow.

 

[BigBlueHen53]

I remember playing this with my Dad. First he would twitch his hands to make you all jumpy, then he would hold his hands very still for a long time to relax you and lull you into a false sense of security, then WHAP! and Gotcha! We had so much fun.

 

[The Brick Coop]

Some kids just don't like poultry. Or birds. Forcing them to learn how to deal with hard-pecking defensive birds without giving them a shield will likely cause them to hate chickens forever. With my girls the same thing started to happen, but worse--with a juvenile rooster. He just danced at first but they learned it was a prequel to an attack. So I said they could pick him up every time he danced at them, and baby him, carry him cradled (on his back) and dress him in big-doll clothes. they couldn't believe I said that, and had a ball with it! and the cockerel learned that if they noticed him, he'd better be ok with getting made over. He didn't like it so always chose to keep away. But he also learned they would not hurt him. They learned to not be afraid of even roosters because as he grew the girls saw how he retained the training..

 

[BarnyardChaos]

So?

Would you want to do a job you hated, even if you got paid for it? Or would you quit and find something better for yourself?

My parents went through a divorce when I was 10. It's not easy to go through mentally. My mother forced me and my sister to talk with a physicist... doubt that worked, only saw the guy once, but I hated it.

My parents went through divorce when I was four, and my mother married an abusive drunk who nearly beat her to death, while (according to my brothers) I watched. I don't remember it. He did worse to me, and I remember that. Then my Dad won custody when he married again. I rarely saw my mother after that - they hid me and my brothers from her. My step-mother abused me physically and emotionally until I ended up in the hospital with ulcers at age 15. Her son raped me, but she beat me again for "making it up." I ran away from home then, and never looked back. I still carry the scars. I went through divorce myself with a 7-yo son, while putting myself through college (3.87 GPA) - and our home burned down weeks before graduation. So I *know* about going through tough times. Do you?

No one wants to do a job they hate, no matter the pay. But guess what got me through those tough times? Yep, doing jobs I hated and persevering through it, until I could do better. My first priority was my son's welfare, feeding us, and keeping a roof over our heads. It's not so easy to just quit and find something that suits better.

I apologize to you for seeming like this is a contest; it's not. I just wanted you to know that I know what it's like and how it feels. I hope you don't take offense, and I hope you never have to experience any of that. And I hope my grandkids never know what that's like, either - but I want them to be tough enough, and confident enough to handle it, if it does.

If the worst they have to face and overcome is a mean hen and a few pecks on the hand, then they will be truly blessed and lucky. I hope it's so.

 

[BarnyardChaos]

Well so much for that suggestion! Reading is my great delight, I certainly wasn't thinking of it as a punishment. My apologies!

None needed! And I love reading, too. I am lost if I don't have a book to read every day. I'm currently reading the Outlander series for the second time. And I read books to the kids whenever I can.

 

[BigBlueHen53]

My parents went through divorce when I was four, and my mother married an abusive drunk who nearly beat her to death, while (according to my brothers) I watched. I don't remember it. He did worse to me, and I remember that. Then my Dad won custody when he married again. I rarely saw my mother after that - they hid me and my brothers from her. My step-mother abused me physically and emotionally until I ended up in the hospital with ulcers at age 15. Her son raped me, but she beat me again for "making it up." I ran away from home then, and never looked back. I still carry the scars. I went through divorce myself with a 7-yo son, while putting myself through college (3.87 GPA) - and our home burned down weeks before graduation. So I *know* about going through tough times. Do you?

No one wants to do a job they hate, no matter the pay. But guess what got me through those tough times? Yep, doing jobs I hated and persevering through it, until I could do better. My first priority was my son's welfare, feeding us, and keeping a roof over our heads. It's not so easy to just quit and find something that suits better.

I apologize to you for seeming like this is a contest; it's not. I just wanted you to know that I know what it's like and how it feels. I hope you don't take offense, and I hope you never have to experience any of that. And I hope my grandkids never know what that's like, either - but I want them to be tough enough, and confident enough to handle it, if it does.

If the worst they have to face and overcome is a mean hen and a few pecks on the hand, then they will be truly blessed and lucky. I hope it's so.

 

[BarnyardChaos]

I just want to say to everyone that I truly appreciate all the responses, suggestions and encouragement. I'm having trouble keeping up with all the responses, and want to answer every one if I can. Give me some time; I'll get around to it.

And this..... GOOD NEWS!!!
I made an arm and hand shield from a soda bottle, and my grandson tried it out today with enthusiasm. The grumpy hen pecked him immediately, and you should have seen his face! "Grandma! It worked! I didn't even feel it!!!"
I showed him to put the basket down so he could use both hands to deal with the hen and move the eggs safely. When his sister came into the coop, he jumped with excitement to show her how the shield worked, and HE explained to her about moving the eggs.

It's her turn tomorrow. And I'll be right beside her. We're going to also try the whisk broom to deflect the hen's pecking, and see if she likes that better.

 

[BigBlueHen53]

Part of me wants to say I'm sorry you went through all that ... but another part is totally in awe of you for being the strong, resilient and capable woman you are as a result of all that.

 

[BigBlueHen53]

I just want to say to everyone that I truly appreciate all the responses, suggestions and encouragement. I'm having trouble keeping up with all the responses, and want to answer every one if I can. Give me some time; I'll get around to it.

And this..... GOOD NEWS!!!
I made an arm and hand shield from a soda bottle, and my grandson tried it out today with enthusiasm. The grumpy hen pecked him immediately, and you should have seen his face! "Grandma! It worked! I didn't even feel it!!!"
I showed him to put the basket down so he could use both hands to deal with the hen and move the eggs safely. When his sister came into the coop, he jumped with excitement to show her how the shield worked, and HE explained to her about moving the eggs.

It's her turn tomorrow. And I'll be right beside her. We're going to also try the whisk broom to deflect the hen's pecking, and see if she likes that better.

SUCCESS!

 

[BarnyardChaos]

Hmmm my 3 year old would drive his 12 volt tractor out with a bucket and return with a bunch of broken eggs. I don’t think I have ever mentioned to my kids they can get pecked or it hurts…. I feel like without being there to know the situation advice is hard but sounds like the idea of it was made into a big deal?

It certainly has been a mountain made from a mole-hill and feels like it has turned into a contest of wills. I hate that it has turned out to be so frustrating for everyone.

Your description of your grandson and his tractor made me laugh. I can so picture it, and he must've had the biggest grin on his face for collecting eggs for you!